We have an informal rule (more like a “super-strong hope”) that if you cheffed, you don’t clean. Seems simple, but it easily evens out the effort that goes into having homemade, sit-down meals without one person being toast by bed (and, it’s particularly nice after long days when neither of us really wants to do either). Both of us love cooking, and while few folks *like* cleaning, a sparkly kitchen after a delicious meal is something to behold.
Truth is, though, we break the cooking/cleaning rule all the time because they’re often the first post-workday activities we’re able to enjoy together after being apart. Yet having an unspoken and implied balance of responsibility keeps us mindful of each other’s daily routine and all the things we know the other does on the down-low to keep our house running well, and our fam happy and healthy.
Why is this an important question (...and it doesn’t have to be about cooking: apply it to any set of chores that need tending)? When cohabimates mutually respect each other’s time and energy, it helps keep them on the lookout for ways to improve each other’s day by lightening the other’s load. And more often than not, attention makes c-a-r-e spell l-o-v-e.
Our advice? Whether it’s verbal, a random act of kindness or a future IOU, consciously recognize when your partner does an activity you maybe-kinda know they don’t want to do. Because while the chef gets the majority of the props for the good eats…it’s the dishwasher who makes the next meal possible.